Peace of Mind… (blog)

Today, I woke up to the sound of Chandler wiggling on her back on the floor next to the bed and her tags jingling as she moved back and forth. We have a little routine in the mornings that includes play and me scratching her belly before I get up. This morning, however, she wanted us both to get up right away – and so we did.

It has been a little tough on Chandler lately, because although there are days I can take her on a Walk, on other days, my knee hurts or feels unstable enough that I can’t.

Enter, Kelli’s back yard. There is plenty of area for Chandler to be outside, and to tip over on her side in the sunshine to take a nap. Unfortunately, there is just enough space under the gate/fence for her to get out into the front and into the street. Fortunately, I had purchased some chicken wire to attach to the gate/fence so the yard would be secure. And, today, I installed it.

You might wonder what all of this has to do with Peace. For this Peace Walker, there are several things at play here:

First, I’ve had the chicken wire for about a week and every day, I have thought about putting it up. Today, when I did it, there was a little less chatter in my head. Less chatter, more Peace.

Next, I know Chandler needs exercise, and sometimes, I can’t Walk her. Now, she can explore outside, lie in the sun and even fetch/chew sticks I throw for her. And we get to be together. Knowing that she is safe and nurtured, removes the angst of letting her go outside. Less angst, more Peace.

And finally, while I am fairly certain that Chandler would prefer a Walk, having an alternative for her, gives me the option of resting, icing and elevating my knee when it hurts, rather than forcing myself to Walk her. Less pain, more Peace.

These are all relatively small things on their own, but the more space I consciously create for Peace in my own life, the greater the Peace I have to share.

What seemingly little thing is there, that you know if you did it, would create more Peace in you life? What is a step you can take toward completing it? Are you willing, for the sake of Peace, to do it?

 

Upon awakening to the news of three police officers shot and killed and three others injured in Baton Rouge, LA, I was feeling a deep heaviness in my heart, and I felt like I wanted to hide out and not be around people for the day.

However, I had made plans with a couple of people, and I wanted to keep my commitment to them. So, when it was time for us to go, I thought about it, and I decided to go and see what the day would bring.

I’ll backtrack long enough to say that in my time in recovery, one of the things I’ve learned is that sometimes, doing the opposite of what I want to do can bring about amazing results. Today was a perfect example.

My two friends and I went to an outdoor music event called Worldfest at the Nevada County fairgrounds. We spent the entire day outside, listening to music and conversing with people we knew and others we didn’t.

I met John first and when I saw his coveralls, I felt drawn to go over and speak with him. John, his best friend and their caregiver were sitting under the shade of a huge pine tree, enjoying one of the groups performing on the stage about 200 yards in front of them. We spent time talking about how perfect a day it was, and John asked what Walk for Peace means. I visited with the three of them, talking and sharing about the Walk and the need for Peace in the world, and stopping here and there to listen to the music. 

I asked John for a picture, and he happily obliged. And you know, as I walked away, I was feeling grateful for having said yes to the day.

Late in the afternoon, I saw this lovely gentleman and his daughter. I approached them and introduced myself. I said that I wanted to meet them because of the cool clothes they were wearing. The young lady explained that her daddy doesn’t want any more wars. I told her I didn’t want any more either, and that is why I am Walking for Peace. With their permission, I got these two pictures.

In addition to the people I’ve told you about, I met several other folks today. I talked to people all day, and invited them to come to the meeting I’m hosting to talk about Peace. (For those of you who don’t know, the meeting for Peace will be on Tuesday, 7/19 from 6:30-8:00 pm at Valentina’s Bistro – 841 Sutton Way, Grass Valley, CA.)

For this Peace Walker, the willingness to do something I’ve committed to, and not back out by making excuses, is one of the easiest ways for me to shift the perspective. My decision to feel the heaviness of the shooting in Baton Rouge, and to go out and be in community  in spite of it, turned my day around. The people I encountered and the community I experienced today remind me that Peace can sometimes come from unexpected places.

Today I had the great good fortune of being outside almost all day. I went to a barbecue/potluck party for a friend who was celebrating a huge milestone in her life.

At the end of the day, I met a new friend named Indigo. When I saw her across the parking lot, I asked if she would come put her hair up next to my t-shirt so we could see how close a match it was. Indigo was happy to oblige. We had a few laughs, and she gave me the name of the hair color (atomic turquoise), and told me where I could buy it. I talked a little about the Walk, I took this picture and we said our goodbyes.

Earlier in the day, I had several opportunities to talk about the Walk, and to share with folks the chance to come to the meeting for Peace on Tuesday. I spoke at length with a woman named Judy, and she asked lots of questions about my experiences so far. She also thanked me for being willing to Walk and talk about Peace. We talked about people finding a language that encourages listening and and respect, even when people aren’t of the same opinions.

Before that, I had a nice talk with someone whom I hadn’t seen in about seven or eight years. We caught up a bit, and he asked what I’m up to. I told him about the Walk and we settled into a conversation about his return to writing; a long time passion of his. He mentioned he ha been  thinking about developing a character who is a “walker”, and then we talked about some actual walkers of our time.

All day today, I had the opportunity to engage in conversations with people and to talk about Peace. And, I had the opportunity to be in the beautiful outdoors with picture perfect weather, and to be in community with a group of people honoring one of its elders.

I feel rejuvenated after spending so much of the day outside. I feel happy to have been in town for today’s festivities. I feel lighthearted and joyful. I feel Peace.

 

It is again with a heavy heart that I sit to write this post tonight. The unrest caused by the attempted coup in Turkey is palpable.

Again, I am resolved to do more in the Walk for Peace.

I had a conversation with a woman in the drug store today. As she came in the door, she commented that she liked my shirt. I thanked her and told her about the Walk for Peace. She seemed to be in a bit of a hurry, but said she was glad to hear that “somebody was doing some good”.

Next, I went and spent a couple of hours at Valentina’s, talking to folks about Peace. I explained that I am holding a meeting there (Valentina’s Bistro in Grass Valley, CA from 6:30-8:00 pm on Tuesday, 7/19), to build community and to get people talking with one another about Peace. I also asked them to invite folks they know to come and be a part the community.

I am a single individual doing what I can for Peace. Next week, I’ll hold the first of what I hope will be many meetings to join in community for Peace. I will continue to be a voice for Peace wherever I am. I firmly believe that we have the ability to bring Peace into our lives and the lives of others, as well as the world.

We make time for the things that are “important” in our lives; imagine what could happen if taking action for Peace fell into the “important” category…

In this moment, I mourn for the people who were present in Nice, France when another unprovoked, violent attack occurred there earlier  today. I feel heartbroken as I write this post tonight.

And, I feel a deep resolve to be a part of finding a way to Peace in our world.

For this Peace Walker, it is about having conversations and interactions about Peace everywhere I go, and with whomever I meet. It is about choosing to respond with considered action rather than to react with hateful rhetoric. And, it is about inclusion rather than exclusion.

If we stand behind the bars hoping that someday, we will get what is on the other side, we are likely to be disappointed.

Tonight, however, I choose to let go of the bars and let the gate swing open toward Peace. And I invite each of you to Walk with me. Take one step each day toward Peace.

I’m not at all sure where this post will take us, but if you’ll bear with me, we’ll find out together. Today was an extraordinarily long day – at least for me, emotionally. I got confirmation that my artificial knee joint is failing, and I will need knee “revision” surgery. And, at the present moment, it is possible that the surgery itself won’t happen before the end of August, because the earliest appointment I could get to meet with the surgeon was for August 22. It is remotely possible that I will get in earlier (could be as early as next Tuesday), but it’s also possible I won’t.

As my friend Sandy and I headed toward Nevada City, I was feeling sorry for myself. I was thinking about how I don’t want to be in the minuscule percentage of people who have knee replacement that need “revision”. And, I don’t want to wait six weeks to see the surgeon. On and on I went in my head, until I was tired of my own thoughts. And then I got quiet. And Sandy hung in there with me by being in the silence, but not taking on my feelings.

Sandy drove us home via “Old Highway 40”, stopping at one point to look at a couple of stone buildings near the road. As we read the plaque about the buildings, we found out that one of them used to be a gift store where people stopped on their way to and from the Truckee/Lake Tahoe area. The sign also mentioned that with the building of the new freeway (Interstate 80), folks could travel to their destinations much faster, and no longer wanted to stop along the way, so the tiny town’s gift shops and groceries couldn’t generate enough revenue to stay in business.

I was struck by the irony of fast cars and fast lives leading us to miss out on unique and special experiences, like a stop at the small stone gift store along route 40. And I thought about how many things I have seen as I’ve Walked for Peace that I wouldn’t have seen from a car. Somehow, my mind calmed enough to simply be with my friend, looking at a cool historical momument, and I was grateful that Sandy had stopped.

My guess is that in the next little while, I will go in and out of total acceptance of the circumstances surrounding this part of the Walk for Peace. At the very least, I know that I can recover fairly quickly to a place of acceptance if/when I choose too.

Overall, I am very lucky. I have a wonderful friend to stay with, and Chandler is happy and welcome here. I have clothes, food and a place to lay my head at night. And, I am getting the medical care I need.

I have more than enough.

 

Today I went to a meeting, and as I was approaching the entrance, a woman said that she noticed my shirt and was wondering if I was “that woman on Facebook that’s walking for Peace”. I said yes, and she said she’s been following my posts. We talked for a moment longer, and I thanked her for her support, and she thanked me for Walking and for sharing about it.

After the meeting, I went to the local co-op and sat outside, visiting with some of the patrons and sharing about the Walk for Peace. I invited one gentleman to join me, and we talked for a few minutes. He drew a card from the 1conversation for Peace deck, which he chose keep and think about. Robert also took some time to enjoy Chandler. He scratched and petted her, and spoke to her with such kindness, that I was moved listening to it. As Robert left, I felt deeply happy for the moments of conversation we shared.

Tonight, I am grateful for the conversations I had today. I’m excited about learning from and sharing with others about Peace.

This tiny little flower was hiding amongst some larger plants in the garden bed next to where I sat today, and I had the sense that was thriving because of the other plants around it.

We too, can help others to flourish and grow. My experience today reminded me that the more I give away, the more I receive. Join me in the Walk for Peace by having conversations where you exchange ideas about Peace. Take Peaceful action. Speak with Peaceful words. Invite others to share their concept of Peace with you. Most of all, be Peace in your life. The more we give it away, the greater the Peace there is in the world.

As the sun goes down in the evenings where Chandler and I have the good fortune to be staying, the fountain in the back yard is illuminated, and the water falls gently over the rocks. Sometimes, when I awaken in the night, I crack the door open and listen to the water. As I listen, I close my eyes and concentrate on synchronizing my breathing with the rhythm of the water. When I have settled to the point where I notice nothing but my breathing and the water, I find a Peace deep within my center.

When I was a young child, my family used to spend a good part of our summers “at the beach” in Dana Point, CA. I used to love to lie on a towel, with one on top (so I could avoid the wicked sunburn my fair skin was susceptible to), and doze off. I love the Peaceful feeling of floating between the sleep and waking state where the ocean waves actually feel like they are breaking all around you, and the sound of people’s voices whisper unintelligibly in your subconscious. The feeling of awakening, slightly groggy, and throwing off the towel to run and dive into the ocean is one that I can still feel today.

My sisters and I used to play a game called Sunday Morning Rush Hour. In it, there would be passengers who rode on the shoulders of the drivers. We would race around the house passing each other until one of the drivers lost their passenger. On one such occasion, I jammed my big toe into the desk in the den, and actually broke it. In the doctor’s office, I had whirlpool therapy for my toe. That meant that I got to soak my foot (Dr. Andrews let me soak both feet) in a metal tub with swirling water jets and warm water with rosemary oil in it. I loved the feel of that water circulating around my feet and up my calves, and to this day, I love the smell of rosemary.

Why do these stories matter? For me, being near or in water calms me and brings me a sense of Peace. I am not, of course, always near a fountain, the beach or a rosemary infused whirlpool. However, I do have the option at any time, to close my eyes, and take myself there in my mind. When I am distracted or feeling dis-ease, I can, in a matter of moments, guide myself to water and recover to Peace.

This frog sculpture made me smile, and when I found out it doubles a sprinkler (connect a hose in the back and water arches out of its mouth), I decided to put it at the top of the post tonight.

Today, I had the chance to visit with my dear friends Melissa and Maggie. The last time we were all together was about a month before I began the Walk for Peace.

What I can tell you about these two women is that they have both been teachers of the way of Peace for me.

Melissa mentored me by teaching me ways to truly ground in myself and in my intuition. It was through my work with Melissa that I became comfortable with my spiritual practice, and with the gifts I bring to the world. Our friendship has given me permission to explore and integrate the spiritual, energetic and empathic parts of my myself, inviting their full expression.

Maggie opened her heart to me the day I met her, inviting me to do the same. I have had the opportunity to watch Maggie consistently seek greater understanding of herself and her spiritual path, which is inspiring. And there is a playfulness in Maggie that brings out the best of the little girl in me.

We sat for our meal, and as we were together, I was aware of the distance between a having lovely meal with friends and the enormity of the heart wrenching events we have been witness to in this and other parts of our world of late. I thought about how important and natural it is for each of us to seek out friends and family when we are hurting. I also thought about people who might not have the kind of support system I’m fortunate to have.

I reached out to a few people this afternoon to check in and let them know I’m thinking about them. And, I reached out to offer assistance to a couple of people who expressed their ongoing grief. You see, one thing I am sure of is that although I may not know the answer, I can always ask the question:

“How can I help?”

As I took Chandler on her walk this morning, I saw the pieces of this huge evergreen laying upon the forest floor, sloughing off the bark that once served to protect it from the elements and the creatures that might seek refuge in it. I could see that the pieces had been cut by a saw, and one had been moved off the path we were walking on and leaned atop one of the others. And I could see that the tree had split further up, and had most likely fallen across the very path we were on. Instead of walking past, I sat upon one of the pieces and reflected on how long the tree might have been there before it fell, and what might it look like if humans hadn’t cut it into pieces. I thought about the lovely seat that it was now providing me as I relaxed into the Peace and quiet of the forest. As I sat, I noticed hundreds of tiny pinholes in the tree itself, which I imagined to be where some sort of creature had entered to forage for food or to take shelter.

A few steps further along the path, I came across this grouping. Another evergreen, this time standing tall and proud in the filtered sunlight, with older pieces at its base, and I thought about how they were arranged. A mid sized piece lying on its side, propping a smaller, more spindly piece up against the evergreen, as if the three had been this way forever.

On the way back, I heard a snapping noise above me, and I looked up just as a great blue heron left its nest in flight. As the wingspan opened, I realized that I had taken in a huge breath, and I released it, feeling my entire body open to moment.

Here’s what is important about this for me. In these times of extreme stress, sorrow, anger, hostility and confusion, we need to see and feel rest, joy, Peace, love and clarity as well. We need to help one another to know that we can find our way back to Peace.

Each morning, I spend time before I get up, moving and getting in touch with the physicality of my body. I take several deep breaths, inhaling through my nose and exhaling through my mouth. And I meditate – entering the day with an open and Peaceful heart.

Some days, this practice keeps me at Peace all day. Some days, I forget it as soon as I turn to make the bed. Sometimes, I help others as they seek Peace, and sometimes, others reach out to help me find it again.

We have the ability to come home to Peace. In our hearts, our homes, our communities, our nations, our world. We can reset the energy of the world by being Peace everywhere we go and with anyone we interact with.

Where will you reset the energy to Peace today?